Have you been told to “just ask for what you want”? I have many times and am improving. Many of us, women especially, have difficulty asking for what we want. We either feel our needs aren’t important or we simply take care of others first leaving no time for ourselves.
Notice how Tucker has this technique perfected. He knows I am the one who gives the best paw, leg, shoulder and head rubs. He will stand next to me with his paw held out, looking up at me with those pleading eyes. And if I am not quick enough to respond, he will nudge my leg until I do as he asks.
Tucker is direct, kind, and respectful in his ask. There is no question about his request.
How are you at asking? Are you direct, kind and respectful? Do you have a community of people you can ask? Let’s cover 6 tips about building a community.
6 Tips for Developing Your Community:
1. Realize no one will do it for you, but you don’t have to do it alone. This can be a challenge for a mindset change, yet powerful
2. Ask, just like Tucker. Kind, direct, respectful
3. Hang out with the kind of people you want in your community. Are you building a business, losing weight, enjoy social events, small or large groups, one on one? Consider even one person and invite them for coffee or lunch, or a walk in the park.
4. Recognize the importance of the “Negative Nelly”. This person will cause you to pause and be cautious or motivate you to go for it. Either way, there is always something to learn from everyone and every situation.
5. Be cautious about negative words and thoughts. A friend of mine quotes this saying “thoughts become things” frequently and it is so true. One habit I have had and my community of cheerleaders have caught me apologizing way too much. It had become a habit for me to say “I’m sorry…” ALL the time. I still work on this, but I catch myself most of the time.
6. Take time for you. We hear this one a lot also. I teach about time management and am typically good here. Yet, it was pointed out to me this week that I may need to work on “energy management”. If you are an intuitive and empathetic person you know what I’m talking about. Do you give your mental and emotional energy to others, leaving yourself dragging? Be aware of this and manage your energy along with your time.
I LOVE community and thrive in a group of mentors, cheerleaders, role models, confidantes and even the occasional negative nelly just to keep me on my toes.
I know how much I need support, sometimes need to be shown the next step. That is what I’m here for! I have stepped it up a notch with my summer program. Check it out! Our group will begin in July.
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